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Guest Post by Lisa Barr :: Gearing up for that first job interview can be a hard sell. What do you do when a potential employer looks at you on paper and says, “Wow…nice work…but…what have you done lately?”
“Lately” (you think in a panic) does not even cut it on a resume. “Lately,” as in the last decade? Let’s see…diapers, Gymboree, dance, travel sports, doctors’ appointments, groceries, carpool shlepper extraordinaire…I could go on. And I’m sure you could too.
My first moment addressing “Lately” was forced upon me. My ex-husband had disappeared and I was left with two young children and 67 cents in my bank account. I still have the bank receipt. I know, mine was an extreme situation, but the feelings are the same. Who would possibly hire me? I wouldn’t hire me.
……….
So there I was getting ready for my first job interview in nearly 10 years. I was a former editor/reporter for The Jerusalem Post, and I had taken off to raise my two young daughters. I had moved with my family from Jerusalem to Washington D.C. for my husband’s work. At the time I had a 3- and a 5-year old. And he left. He literally disappeared, leaving me alone with two babies and an empty bank account.
When I was finally ready to pick up the pieces, I looked in the mirror and said: You were once a good journalist. No one can take that away from you. Get back on the wagon. Now. But I was admittedly terrified. What if I forgot how to write a good story? I am an idiot when it comes to anything tech-related. What if they ask me to do something fancy on the computer? What if I forget how to edit?
The what-ifs began to paralyze me as the tears welled. What if I no longer have the chops and I simply can’t cut it?
As I started getting dressed for the job interview, I froze. I don’t know how to do this anymore, I thought. And I used to know. Back in the day, in my twenties, I was cocky and fearless and seemed to know how to do everything: What to wear, how to interview, how to get the job. But back then, there was always another job interview waiting in the wings. I was young, carefree, blissfully naïve, and happily ambitious. I seemed to have it all: drive, initiative, creativity, and most of all, the ability to schmooze anyone, anywhere. I viewed obstacles as something fun to divide and conquer. But I had nothing to lose back then. My whole world was all about me. No kids, no real responsibilities.
But now? What could I possibly say to the interviewer? That I have been a full-time mom for years? That I may be the fastest diaper-changer this side of Lake Michigan? Or even better, that I single-handedly mastered the fine art of cooking, doing the laundry and paying bills while breastfeeding?
And how, can I possibly answer the inevitable question: “What have you done lately?”
“Lately?” I’d repeat, meeting the interviewer’s gaze head on. I would mention that there was a time not too long ago that I had interviewed world leaders and celebrities. And despite taking time out to raise my kids (my most important job) – I could get my groove back. But could I get my groove back?
As I got dressed, I told myself: Face it, you’re going to have to fake it. Fake the Old Lisa, because she doesn’t exist anymore.
I stood, swiping my hands against my thighs. Stop the pity party and the lamenting about a road no longer traveled. Forget about what was, who you once were, and embrace what is.
***
Here’s what needs to be your new frame of mind: Hire me, you say to yourself, and you’re getting two twenty-somethings. I’m efficient, I understand people, and I always get the job done. Always. You have accomplished so much more than you give yourself credit for. You have served as CEO of a family. That’s what you’ve been doing lately. Own it and sell it. If you play your cards right, I promise you, that job is yours. Like those fine lines around your eyes — you’ve earned it.
Lisa Barr is the editor and creator of GIRLilla Warfare: A Mom’s Guide to Surviving the Suburban Jungle and the author of “Fugitive Colors” (Arcade Publishing), making its debut in October.