Want a Happy Home Life? Learn the “Three C’s”

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At work, your responsibilities are typically concrete and easily defined. You and your co-workers each have job descriptions and assigned duties, and together you work toward a common goal.

When it comes to responsibilities at home, however, job descriptions and assigned duties are shifting. Traditional gender roles used to place most of the domestic responsibilities — child rearing, cooking and cleaning — on the woman. Sixty years ago, when many women did not work outside the home, this domestic arrangement was feasible. However, women’s participation in the workforce is calling for many families to rethink how work gets done at home.

It’s no secret that women play a more significant role in the workforce today. In fact, a recent New York Times article noted that four in ten American households with children under the age of 18 now include a mother who is either the sole or primary breadwinner for her family. Naturally, the shift of career responsibilities calls for a new approaches to home responsibilities.

Who Does What?

Dual-income families are finding it difficult to agree on how to divvy up household chores and responsibilities. Unlike at the office, there is no third party to assign tasks, track your performance and reward you for a job well done. And part of your role in a relationship is to figure out how to successfully execute those actions in a way your partner understands.

Anne Marie Slaughter, who last year wrote the controversial article “Why Women Still Can’t Have It All,” authored a new piece in The Atlantic examining the roles of men and women in the household. As women advance in their professional careers, she said, the balance of household duties should fall more on men. Slaughter writes, “Home should be as much an environment for men and women to share responsibility and pool talents as work is. We would all, including our children, be better off.”

Just like in the office, spouses need to manage tasks and work together in order to make a happy home life efficiently and productive. This can certainly be a tricky topic to discuss, but we can begin with a few basic actions to help tone down the possibility of darting glares and heavy sighs.

The “Three C’s”

Tackling household tasks with a teamwork mentality allows couples to achieve a better work-life balance, and creates a healthier environment for the family at large. Long story short, everyone wins once they get into the groove of things. The three C’s are here to help couples who want a happy home life and start smoothly as a team.

Communicate

Respectful communication is vital to any lasting partnership. It helps to curb resentment before it has a chance to sneak into the partnership you’ve nurtured. When you take a closer look at it, it’s also the core of the three C’s. You and your partner must be able to sit down and have an open dialogue about how each of you would like the household to run. It’s important to discuss schedules, limitations and expectations to have a happy home life.

Even communicating something as dull as household tasks can help strengthen the bond between the two of you. As Ann Morrow Lindbergh said, “good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after.”

Compromise

The next step after speaking is to bring on the action. Divide and conquer with your partner, making sure both of you are comfortable with each other’s responsibilities. And the same rule from above applies here: be respectful. How can you ever expect to get anything done as a team if you’re not acting like one?

Unfortunately, deciding where to meet in the middle can be as exhausting as your workday itself. Sarah Jessica Parker once wisely questioned, “in a relationship, when does the art of compromise becoming compromising?” Look out for yourself by being aware of what makes you comfortable  and voicing it – and make sure your partner is getting a chance to communicate what they feel is fair.

Congratulate

Unlike in the workplace, there is no financial gain for successfully completing a household task. It may seem trivial to congratulate your partner for taking out the trash or washing the dishes, but positive verbal recognition is another branch of communication that can help strengthen a partnership.

Showing your appreciation helps both you and your partner recognize how well you work as a team. It’s a healthy and effective way to encourage each other to take household responsibilities seriously. It’s incredibly easy to begin taking things for granted in a relationship – but habitually saying “thank you” rewards your partner intrinsically for the little things.

In summary, communicate openly, be willing to compromise and be sure to congratulate one another on domestic achievement for a happy home life. Would you say you’re following the three C’s in your household?

Women Powering Business is a diverse community of dynamic working women within various industries who are elevating the dialogue around issues and topics that today’s women face in the workplace. From work/life balance issues to climbing the career ladder, Women Powering Business covers a variety of topics and offers a place for working women to gain insight, get inspired and share advice on how to navigate today’s workplace.